Hugh Curley

Happiness and Love – The New Math

When we were children, we were told to share our toys because there were not enough for everyone to have all they wanted. The toys my brother was playing with were not available to me. The same thing happened when it was time for desert; if I got a larger piece of cake, he got a smaller one. We were working with a fixed amount of the asset and when dividing it, if one person got more, the other person got less.

In school, the training was reinforced. There could only be a certain percentage of “A’s” in each class. If your team won in gym class, my team lost. There could only be one valedictorian (although in my graduating class there were three).

Then we applied for a job and saw that the process was very competitive, two applicants for the one job. One person won, the other lost.

This is called a “zero-sum” process – if I get three more, you must get three fewer.

But some assets do not fit the zero-sum concept; with them, the more you give, the more you get. Two of these assets are happiness and love. The only way to get more happiness in your life is to give more happiness to others. If you want more people to smile at you, then smile at more people. If you want more people to like or love you, start by liking or loving more people.

If I have one toy and give it to you, I now have none. If I have one smile and I give it to you, you will return it making two smiles. Probably, you and I will both then give two other people smiles, and they will return them making a total of six smiles. This can go on creating many smiles – all from the one I gave away in the beginning.

Except with babies, you receive what you give. If you give no happiness or love, you will get none. If you give a little, you will get a little. If you give a lot, you will get a lot. Decide how much happiness and love you want and give that much to others.